Category: Short Essays and Responses

We’ve now read a good deal of The Case for Trump.

Using the readings, respond to the statement in bold below. You may take any position on it you like; just be sure that you make a case for your position based on the readings.

Hanson’s reasoning concerning the 2016 election is weak and indefensible. Trump was an exceptionally unprepared and incompetent candidate who was elected simply because racism, sexism, xenophobia, and homophobia are so rampant in the US. Further, there is no evidence that there is a ‘cultural elite’ or an ‘Ancien Regime’ as he describes them.

Our current sexual institution in the US is one that can be defined as quick sex institution. It has been made into something where relationships are rare, but sex with a stranger is normal. We have made a society where people are looking for quick sexual gratification and nothing more. Regnerus argue that in a natural setting woman are looking for long-term, meaningful, and emotional relationships, and men just want sex. I tend to disagree with his argument. After the sexual liberation of women this generalization does not engulf all women and all men. There are many women who have decided that this ideal of a relationship it too much and they do not want it. I find that it doesn’t matter what sex you are, it matters what you want out of the relationship. This new culture is not hurting one sex but both. 

            Sexual gratification only comes after you have gotten something that you want out of the experience. According to Regnerus men want sexual gratification in the form of quick cheap sex, and women want sexual gratification in the form of long-term sexual encounters or in Regnerus words, “love, validation of worth, and fostering or reinforcing relationship commitments” (22). This is not true for all women. For instance, in the beginning of the book Alyssa pointed out that she had over 20 sexual partners and her relationships with them did not last more than a few moments or weeks and she was perfectly happy with her decision. Yet, over time she changed her point of view on the topic and decided that she did indeed want something more that would give her a family. This trend is prevalent in most people in our generation, no matter what sex they are, showing that fulfilment comes to both sides in a cheap sex culture. There is a need for cheap sex at a young age, because it is available, yet as time goes by there is a demand for something meaningful. 

            Our sexual culture is purely a hookup culture at this point. Not long-ago sex was a gift that was given by women after men had shown intentions of staying with them. Yet, now it is something that is given after knowing a stranger for five minutes, and no names are pressed to be given. This is due to the fact that women no longer hold onto this power. Before it was up to the women to decide when sex was going to start in the relationship, but after the sexual liberation women have decided that they wanted to behave the way men have been for years. They wanted to know what it would be like to have sex with a stranger. Women want to be treated as equals in the sexual market, but women want the dating market to be unequal, they want men to be more giving in relationships. Alyssa talks about the sexual attractiveness when a man courts her and it is not the same as when everything is split equal, “ it feels much better, romantically, and its more arousing to be taken out and treated well” (50). The market has a double standard for both genders, women want to be equal in sexual habits, but before that can happen, they want to be courted and chased after. 

            Pornography plays a huge role in our mating and dating market. It has become available to the masses in a way that is easier and cheaper in every way. Regnerus says that more men watch porn then women, and he supports this with data. Yet, this data could be wrong. A lot of women watch porn, but they are highly unlikely admit to it. This is because there is a social stigmatism around the act of watching pornography. It is seen as unladylike and crude for a woman to watch porn, so they won’t admit to it more often than a man would, because for men it is seen as a normal everyday habit. Even if a woman does not know the person asking them if they use pornography, they will still hesitate or decline, because they will be marked in that person’s mind as a masculine woman, and no women wants to be seen poorly. If pornography was destigmatized, we would see higher rates of women watching porn immediately because it will be okay for them to admit to it. 

            In the end the mating and dating culture in the US is centered around fast and easy sex. It is unfair to say that it is hurting one sex because in reality it is hurting both sexes. It causes people to be able to stay in their own world and not have to interact with people and treat them like human beings. If this wasn’t our current culture, then we would see higher rates of satisfaction on both sides not just women. All genders benefit from emotional connections with others and it helps people grow and develop. This is not just a problem for women, because they are not the only ones this cheap sex culture is affecting. It may give men a chance to have more sexual partners and experience more things but to have a fulfilling life you need to experience an emotional connection every once in a while. 

Regnerus’ argument, and the evidence he musters to support it, shows clearly that the current mating and dating culture/market is harmful to the interests of most women and just makes it easier for men to get the central good they want from women (sexual access) without any real exchange of other goods that women desire (e.g., emotional attachment, long-term monogamous commitment). As a society, we should rethink this piece of our culture and try to find ways to adjust it in ways that would make the experiences of women like Alyssa (who is described at length in the book) more fulfilling and healthy.

In his book “Cheap Sex”, Mark Regnerus details the dramatic change in the developed world’s relationship with sex that has slowly emerged since the advent of birth control and digital pornography. In concert with the sexual revolution and the full integration of women into educational institutions and the workforce, the ability to have sex while preventing pregnancy has greatly impacted dating, marriage, sex (with who, when, why), and the framework through which relationships are evaluated. Paramount among these effects has been an altered mating marketplace where men have gained an increasing advantage. The current mating and dating market has lowered the market price of sex, making it easier for men to get the goods they want from women (sexual access) without any real exchange for the goods women desire such as emotional attachment and long term monogamous commitment.

The abundance of sexual opportunity provided by women individually has the collective outcome increasing men’s power in relationships, with power being defined as “the function of the dependence of one actor on another.” (37) When sex is cheap, female partners are increasingly replaceable for men which diminishes their incentive to stay in relationships, especially ones where demands for commitment or exclusivity are being placed. Therefore, the more the price falls, the more difficult it will be for women to acquire the goods they value. 

Sexual access has become unfathomably cheap for men compared to the price in resources and commitment their great grandparents had to pay for the same. The relationships in America data cited by Regnerus highlights the fact that “45% of women said they first had sex with their current (or most recent) partner no later than the first two weeks of their relationship,” (98) and about 15% of those interactions took place only on the first date. Every woman that Regnerus cites from his personal interview references giving men sex early on in their relationships, expecting almost nothing in return, and even granting sexual requests faster when with a man who is not perceived as ‘relationship material.’

The shifting power dynamic in the sexual exchange has altered the marriage market by dramatically increasing competition amongst females. The bifurcated mating market characterizing today’s society is uneven; “there are more men in the sex corner of the pool than women and more women than men over in the marriage corner.” (35) As sex has cheapened, men have become less marriageable because “the wearying detour of getting education and career prospects to qualify for sex” (149) can now be easily skipped. The supply of marriageable men has lowered during the same time frame in which women have become increasingly economically independent and have “altered the criterion of marriageability to include not just the economic prospects of men but other latent traits as well” (148) such as “personal traits like affability, flexibility, personality, social support, and ideological homogeneity.” (149) As competition for the goods women want increases, the percentage of them who will end up in a situation that they are happy about will fall. 

Alyssa, one of the women Regnerus has interviewed, has run the gamut of cheap sexual experiences that are commonplace in today’s society. Her use of pornography started at age 9, her first sexual relationship was at age 15, she was addicted to porn in college, and has had more than 20 partners before settling into a cohabitation relationship at the age of 27. (119) But now, her interests have shifted; she lost her “interest in partner hopping and for experiencing… new people and new syles and new lifestyles,” (149) instead wanting to “settle down [and] stay put.” (149) Due to the changes to the mating market, however, the odds that Alyssa will get what she wants are increasingly slim. Alyssa’s life may end up looking like another of Regnerus’ interviewees. He leads off the book by presenting the story of Sarah, a 35-year-old who is childless and unable to locate commitment from men no matter where she looks. Unless the ‘cheap sex’ element of our culture is rethought, the altered sexual market will result in ever-increasing numbers of women finding themselves stuck in this seemingly inescapable conundrum.