Mark Regnerus in Cheap Sex discusses the ways in which the market for sex has evolved. He highlights how the market has essentially made sex cheaper and overall more accessible. He expresses how women are more interested in pursuing a relationship on an emotional level rather than one that is purely physical, but modern social challenges. Men are more likely to pursue relationships that provide physical pleasure and satisfaction rather than that of emotions. With many emerging innovations that provide aspects such as online pornography, dating apps, and improved contraceptives, men have more access to pleasure and satisfaction without needing an emotional connection. This often forces women to have to settle and prevents them from finding the emotional attachment and long-term monogamous commitment they desire.
Modern technologies have allowed relationships to become overall less emotional and more gravitate towards satisfaction and physical desire. Porn is convenient and requires a low amount of effort to reach satisfaction and pleasure, which is statistically more often men than women. We view men such as Carlos, who places these desires over the happiness and comfortability over his girlfriends. He is more concerned with getting what he needs than the emotional commitment and relationships he has in real life with a real human being. His girlfriend stays with him, even though he frequently does things purely for sexual satisfaction that anger her or makes her uncomfortable. She is forced to have low expectations and settle, as there are fewer men available who put the needs of their girlfriends over their sexual desire. When males have porn it makes women almost replaceable, forcing women to be more accommodating to male needs and desires. According to Regnerus, 45% of women had sex in the first two weeks of their relationship, but expect nothing in return. The emergence of contraceptives allows men and women to have sexual relationships while lowering the risk of the future commitment of having to raise a baby, removing a great amount of commitment that was present in the previous years. Previously, men and women would often wait to have sex to avoid the risks of the commitment of having and raising children, but now, it can almost be guaranteed that the potential of having a baby is taken out of the picture. This removes a large amount of commitment to a sexual relationship. It makes sex both less serious and less attached.
In many cases, such as that of Alyssa, we see women struggle to settle down and find a man who wishes to do so with them. Although Alyssa began as a person who enjoyed having multiple partners and watching porn, she grew to wish for a committed relationship. Unfortunately, in our modern-day society, it is often difficult for women to find a man who desires the same. Men are so used to the accessibility of cheap sex that it becomes detrimental to females who wish to find someone to share a monogamous relationship with. Although those who are unmarried are still a minority, the number is higher than it has been in our modern society. Unless we fix the element of cheap sex, women will continue to struggle to find a life partner as highlighted by Regnerus.
2 replies on “Short Essay #6”
I enjoyed reading your essay and hearing your stance on this topic. I think there is a lot of room for potential for your essay to be great. To improve your essay, you should add a more concrete and specific thesis because it will set the groundwork for your argument. In your second paragraph, you start to summarize the things Regnerus talks about in his book. I think to improve this would be to limit the summarization and add direct quotes and more personal analysis because your own analysis holds substantial significance to your paper. In your last sentence you mention “unless we fix the element of cheap sex” then “women will continue to struggle to find a life partner” and I agree with this statement, but you don’t explain in your essay how we can fix the element of cheap sex. If you give me more specifics to this idea, then I think your essay will improve tremendously. Besides the critiques I mentioned, I think you have a solid start and with improvements it could make this essay great.
You bring up a lot of solid points throughout your essay and even bring in a solid statistic from the reading. I like how you contrast statistics by bringing up real life cases such as Carlos and Alyssa. The point you bring up in the end regarding the future of relationships if we do not fix cheap sex is a good one, but could be reinforced by some possible applications in society that could make sex cheaper. Lastly, try and set up a coherent thesis and a few points that you will discuss throughout your essay and tie it all together in the end. Overall, you bring up many good points, and your essay will be a lot stronger with a few minor adjustments.