In the book Cheap Sex by Mark Regnerus, he describes sex and the mating market in America. Furthermore, Regnerus explores how it has evolved over the years, especially because it is in many ways become cheaper as well as easier for people of various ages and sexual preferences. This can be seen with different technologies and opinions about sex, which has changed the way people pursue sexual actions. On one hand, men often enjoy this easier access and new abilities as they are more interested in the pleasure of having sex as opposed to having genuine relationships. On the other hand, women are more interested in having emotional attachment and long-term monogamous commitment, which has been less evident in recent history. Of course, these are generalizations as some men and some women have different opinions. Regnerus explains how this change has come about due to a number of reasons, such as applications like Tinder or the replacement of having sex with pornography and masterbation. Many people do not believe this is a healthy and correct way of life. While I do believe the use of this newer and cheaper sex can have some benefits, it should be only used to a certain degree. Therefore, as a society, we should rethink this piece of our culture and try to find ways to adjust it so that the experiences for all people are more fulfilling and healthy. This will allow the current mating and dating culture/market to be less harmful to the interests of most women and make it less easy for men to get the central good they want from women (sexual access) without any real exchange of other goods that women desire.
A problem with these new developments is that the relationships seem less genuine and authentic. Furthermore, this has led to more casual sex and one night stand type of interactions instead of long term relationships. This is especially harmful to women, who generally seem to want the typical style of dating. Consequently, this can lead to men taking advantage of womens’ bodies and only using them for their own benefit. Alyssa, a twenty-seven year old woman from Milwaukee who is interviewed throughout the book, often answers questions in regard to her own sex and mating history. She explains how when she was younger she was into pornography, and how it has influenced her and many others in her generation who grew up with the internet. Despite her admitting to watching pornography, she explains how it has hurt sexual interactions in many ways as it has become more mechanical as you do not have to be connected to your partner. Therefore, it has turned into much less of a loving or emotional act, which certainly hurts the value of relationships. As she has gotten older, she explained that she is looking to settle down (118-119). This demonstrates that women sometimes do take advantage of cheap sex, however, when the time is right they often want to have a long term relationship and ultimately get married.
With this information in mind, there is no clear answer or way to make these experiences more fulfilling and healthy. One possible solution would be to provide more education and information available on this topic, especially to young adults and those who are starting to take part in these actions. Ultimately, any possible solution would likely involve limiting the access to these new factors that allow for cheap sex, however, this would need to involve self control and honesty. Therefore, in many ways it is up to the individual on how to go about their own sexual life, but being educated and well informed may be the best possible option. By rethinking and reshaping our culture, it will lead to more authentic relationships where the partners truly love each other. As a result, it will lead to women, as well as all types of people, feeling more fulfilled and healthy with their relationships in our society.
6 replies on “Short Essay #6”
I think this essay did a very good job at condensing and summarizing the argument that Regnerus makes throughout his book and I liked how you brought in specific sections of the book and details like Alyssa’s interview to help exemplify things that the author was arguing. I also agree that in order for a change to come in relation to the mating and dating market people must be educated and having people be aware and able to make decisions with the most information possible is the best way to create a change in the way people interact in this social realm of society.
When reading this essay I was very impressed by the clarity of the argument and the organization of the writing. I never found myself confused or lost. I also think that your use of evidence, especially with the references to Alyssa, are extremely beneficial. While overall I think your argument is strong, I think it could be even stronger if you acknowledge some of the counterclaims more specifically and attempt to refute them. For example, you state that according to Regnerus most women place more value on relationships than pure sexual acts, however one could argue that this is all based on data from surveys and interviews. As a result, the responses could be skewed based on gender expectations. You could acknowledge this possibility in your essay and claim that while this is a possibility, through anonymity and low stakes, the likelihood of this is low. I think it could also be beneficial for you to expand a bit more on what exactly you mean by education. How do you see this education being spread? Through school? These are just some things to consider. Overall, I think your short essay is especially strong and I really enjoyed reading it.
Reading your essay I was able to clearly understand the summary of Regenerus points. The example of the interviewer Alyssa, helped label the factor that woman can use pornography in their sexual activities. This interview allowed for better evidence rather than just stating that Regenerus surveys and data prove the change in sexual activity. Your conclusion paragraph is a strong summary of everything you talk about. Adding your own opinion to this essay, allowed for a better connection between the concept and the reader. The only thing I would do is to reread to look for grammatical error, other than that, very well written!
The argument in this essay is very well laid out and takes an interesting approach to the subject matter. Despite some people believing that the current sexual market is not structured how it should be, it is a force that cannot be changed overnight. As a result, I agree with your conclusion that this type of market can be used within a society, but should be used with moderation. This way, women gain more control back in the power relationship, but society does not experience a crisis. These types of encounters do often lack permanence and meaningful sentiments, but if one practices exhibiting self control, this too can be changed.
Overall, I felt as though you made some strong points through your writing. Kicking things off, the introductory paragraph could have been split up more. Coming up with an initial thesis statement is critical in planning out the rest of your paper. There were solid facts and claims about the gender advantage in favor of men for cheap sex. In contrast, including a specific instance, which was Alyssa’s, strengthened your point and posed a female’s dilemma. The inclusion of textual evidence from Regnerus’ book further improved your paper. The final paragraph did a good job in wrapping things, but I felt as though it left the reader with a lot to think about. Depending on the person, this could be a good or bad thing.
You structured your essay well and I liked how it flowed. I feel that your thesis is one of the more reasonable ways to go about this issue. Trying to lower the magnitude and use of cheaper sex is a smart way to face this issue. Education is a great way to teach the young age groups about the certain pros and cons of cheaper sex. Ultimately, it is up to the actual person to decide if they want to partake in cheaper sex or not, but providing proper information will positively affect their decisions. Providing some direct quotes from Regnerus and proofreading would strengthen your essay, but I like your focus and reasoning and I think it has a good stance on this issue.